Birthday Diary

So, I'm a birthday person.
I love birthdays...I want people to make a big deal on my birthday. I also try VERY hard to remember the birthday of others and if I can, I try to make a big deal out of it.

I was incredibly surprised when not ONE of my sisters called, emailed or text messaged me on my birthday.
I have four sisters. You would think the odds of ONE of them remembering my birthday would be pretty good, but you thought WRONG.
People I know on the internet but had never met before remembered my birthday, but my blood relatives, my big sisters, my protectors, my other mothers did not.

I think my mother reminded Sister #1 the next day because I got a rushed voice mail wishing me a happy belated birthday.

Sister #2 finally remembered and invited me out to dinner last night. I didn't really want to go to the pity dinner but my mother threatened me so I reluctantly agreed to go. I was perfectly happy pouting about my misfortune of having 4 thoughtless bitches for sisters!

At the dinner, my mom told a story about a woman she knew back in the 60's who bought a brand new Carmen Ghia, quit her job, loaded that tiny car with what little belongings she had, drove to Colorado, got a job the very day she got there and lived happily ever after.

I gazed dreamily out of the window and said, "I have always dreamed about doing that. Just packing my shit in my car and driving to wherever the road leads."
My sister looked at me, puzzled, "But I thought you were going to take care of us, change our adult diapers and push us around in our wheelchairs."

I gave her an antiquated talk-to-the-hand gesture and said, "Are you kidding? You bitches can't even call me on my birthday and you think I'm going to change your diapers? Please!"

It wasn't a horrible birthday, though. I got a lot of good birthday gifts and wishes from a lot of good friends.
I'm just waiting for the city-wide celebration with a parade and a street festival. It's going to happen one day!

PS: Oh! I can't believe I didn't mention the best thing EVER. I ordered a cocktail last night and GOT CARDED! Oh Happy Birthday!